Showing posts with label Raising kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Raising kids. Show all posts

Thursday, September 21, 2017

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“Don’t worry; you’ll take it to like a duck to water.” That is what people say to new moms who are worried about making the transition. It’s like being a parent is an innate skill which everyone in the world possesses. Although most people flourish, it isn’t like they don’t need help. The first couple of months are new and scary and evoke a sense of helplessness. But, where can a new parent turn if they need help? It isn’t as if there is a line of people with great advice. Weirdly, the best place to find help is in the world of business. 

Here are four things the corporate world teaches new parents.

Don’t Trust Anyone

When you work in an office, the mood is tense and the smiles are fake. The reason for this is a lack of trust. As soon as you turn your back, a colleague would happily stick a knife in it for their gain. Babies aren’t as malicious, but they are just as untrustworthy as employees with drive trying to climb the ladder. Leave them alone for one second and they will do everything from putting coins in their mouth to playing with the plug sockets. They need watching at all times like a hawk.

Teamwork Is Essential

Moms often get left to handle the bulk of the responsibility. Usually, it’s the dads who get to go back to work and interact with human adults. Still, it's not a good idea to take their contribution lightly. From coming home and playing with the kids to running you a bath, they have a significant role to play. Quite simply, moms and dads are a team that can take the pressure off each others’ shoulders. Just like in the office, teamwork is essential to keep home life running smoothly and productively. 

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Take Financial Opportunities 

Businesses are always looking to make money. Parents might not think this correlates, but that logic is flawed. Apart from attempting to keep them healthy, parents want to set their kids up for life. To do this, they need money as it makes the world go around. A savings account is an excellent start, yet it is only a foundation. To provide them with a superior lifestyle, you need to go further, such as opening up a line of home equity. With homeequitylineof.credit and their resources, it is possible to pick a perfect service. Then, you can use the money to renovate the property, add value, and provide a great place to live for the kids. 

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Management Is Key

Bornadragon.com has talked about coaching kids to success before. Well, forget about coaching because this is life management. In the early years, it will revolve around picking out their clothes and choosing their meals. Then, it will turn into how to convince them to do the right thing. Finally, there is the bargaining stage where you guide them through the pitfalls of their early and late teenage years. A former manager finds this stuff a breeze because the skills are transferable. 

It’s a dark and dingy world, but it has a softer, cuddlier side which parents can exploit. 

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

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It’s obvious that having a baby changes the way you think about the world - nothing can have more impact on you than becoming a parent. From the second you walk out of the hospital doors to go home, the world will seem a little stranger - and more dangerous - than it ever did before. But it doesn’t just stop when you take the baby home for the first time. Those mindset changes will continue long into the future. Here are a few of the surprising things you might experience when you have children. 

Sleep patterns

It will be a while before your little one starts getting up at a regular time, but once they do it is likely, they will be set for many years to come. And that means that your alarm clock will become an irrelevance. Expect your body clock to start getting you up a lot earlier than you used to as a teenager or partygoing 20-something  - and the prospect of an early night becoming incredibly attractive.

Turning into your mom/dad

No matter how rebellious you were as you transformed into an adult, over the years, you will notice you are becoming your mother or father. It starts when you notice yourself using those little phrases they used to use when you were a kid. Then, you will start seeing little behaviors and decisions you make are exactly the same as mom or pop used to do. And, depending on your genetics, you could wake up one morning, look into a mirror, and see your parent looking back at you. 

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Being aware of the inevitable

As pointed out over at wholelifeinsurance.co, when you have a family, you have to consider their future when you’re not around anymore - what will happen if you pass away? As a hell-raising singleton, everyone would be sad to see you go, of course, but once you have kids, your mortality will play on your mind. There are lots of financial implications when you have loved ones that rely on you for income, and it’s vital for you to consider securing everyone’s future. Whether it's getting life insurance, sorting out a will, or setting savings accounts for your kids, it's important to start putting financial plans in place. 

Belonging to a club

Once you have had a baby, you will start sharing glances, smiles, and little nods with other new moms. But, as your kids get older, you will become a more senior member of this massive but unofficial club, offering your advice - but only when it’s needed, of course - and giving help to other parents whose experiences are similar to yours. In fact, barely a day will go by that you don’t see other members of this prestigious club and discuss issues, share stories, and describe shared problems. 

Minor Irritations

According to parents.com, belonging to the ‘club’ does have some downsides, though. When you’re enjoying your first child, everyone and anyone will offer you advice - and you’ll struggle with trying out all the different suggestions. However, over time you will forge your own path as a mother, and even start finding these know-it-all moms a little on the tiresome side!

What mindset changes have you experienced as a mother? Share your expertise in the comments! 

Friday, September 8, 2017

Everyone knows that fashions come and go. One year, goth is in. The next, we’re taking a trip down memory lane with 80s style. For the most part, these stylistic choices have little more to do with the clothes we wear. And, when fashion shops change, so too do our tastes.

Occasionally, though, a fashion comes to mean more than simply clothes. In recent years, we’ve seen the ‘emo’ style sweeping across youngsters. It dictated everything from the way they acted, to the food they ate. More recently, we’ve seen the development of the ‘hipster’ fashion. 

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Anyone who’s anyone will have cottoned on to the fact that this fashion, predominantly in men, has become the latest lifestyle choice. With man buns, tattoos, and beards galore, hipsters are taking over coffee shops across the world. 

If you have a hipster in your midst, you may feel as though they’re another species. The behaviors of this fashion group are so distinct and alien that they can be baffling. While you may not understand the lifestyle choice, such a tailored choice does make hipsters extremely easy to buy for. So, if the person in question has a birthday coming up, it shouldn’t be difficult to find the perfect gift. To give you some idea of what you should look for, consider these items. 

A top-end coffee machine is sure to go down well. Hipster life and coffee shops go hand in hand. So, why not give them their own professional coffee experience, like that provided by Delonghi machines? Bear in mind that you may also want to stock up on some coffee pods, and perhaps even some espresso cups. 

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An electric razor is also worth considering. It may seem like a contradiction, as beards are all the rage. But, hipsters beards aren’t any old facial hair. Instead, they’re manicured and perfectly trimmed. While not any old razor would offer a trimming function, a little research into the best electric shaver on the market is sure to lead to you to one that does. Options with extra clips and so on are your best bet here. 

Beard oil goes hand in hand with shaving, and should be your next port of call. Did you ever wonder why stylish men had such shiny beards? This is the answer. You could accompany your razor gift with a bottle, or buy a gift set with a few different choices. Attempt to pick out scents you know the person in question will love. They will have this right under their nose, after all. 

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A record player would be another welcome gift. Vinyl has been threatening to reappear for years, and hipsters are making it happen. As such, there are a variety of affordable portable options on the market. Accompany this with a record from their favorite artist, and you’ll be onto a winner. Bear in mind that it’s worth doing your research here, too. Buying an option which is too cheap will see it breaking in no time. 

Thursday, January 19, 2017

With The Right Gadgets, Fun Times Are Anytime!

The 21st Century is bringing an over-reliance on gadgets. That can be a good thing, or a bad thing.

Earlier we wrote about some of the reasons our kids are not getting enough sleep, the first reason? There’s too much going on! Take a look:

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"It’s so easy to fill your kid’s rooms with items. After all, you feel they need items like a TV and a computer to keep them entertained. But if there are lots of things in your kid’s room, you are going to find they will struggle to get to sleep at night. After all, they are going to want to get up and play with their items. And it can make their brain alert if there are lots of things in the room. Therefore, keep the number of items in the room to a minimum to ensure your child gets enough sleep at night. Devices should stay downstairs to ensure your child isn’t tempted to play with them during the night!"

Computers, iPods, tablets and phones are scattered around the modern household - not to mention the presence of music and media. It’s always going on.

That being said, there are plenty of benefits to these gadgets and now that we have looked a negative side of them, we can focus on the positive. As with anything in the world, moderation is key! Gadgets offer a great way to entertain kids at any time!

If your children love gaming, there are so many options on the market! A new Nintendo console is coming out in the Spring, so you may want to bide your time - but right now you can get the Playstation 4, an Xbox One, the PS Vita or Nintendo 3DS. It depends on what is right for your children - if they are always out and about, a Vita or 3DS might be the best option. If they enjoy staying in, the PS4 or Xbox One could be the answer. Kids really are spoilt for choice when it comes to gaming.

Tablet computers can offer a world of entertainment to our kids - so be sure to take advantage of what they can offer! They can be a great way of listening to music, watching movies, or enjoying a book! If you want to listen to music - turn to Spotify or Deezer for curated playlists and any song you can think of! If you enjoy movies, ShowBox offers a fantastic range of movies for you and the family to enjoy at any time, so visit GetShowBoxApp.com to make the most of it. If you want to read, there are plenty of interactive books you can share with your children to inspire and educate. The options are endless!

Of course, you’re going to be using a lot of energy having so much fun with the family, so make sure the devices are charged up and ready to go at all times! Gadgets these days run out of battery faster than ever, so keep the cables close and the batteries full to ensure all these new gadgets are giving your family the fun times, all the time! Remember that moderation is important here - keep the gadgets on, but only when needed.

Friday, January 13, 2017

It’s so important that your child gets enough sleep at night. For one thing, it is so vital for their health. After all, without enough sleep, your child is more at risk of catching a bug. And not only this but they will lose concentration easier at school. Without proper rest, they might end up making silly errors too. And that’s without the mood swings that can occur if your child is feeling tired. Therefore, you need to try and ensure they get enough sleep at night. If you find your child can’t drift off, here are some common reasons why your kid isn’t getting enough sleep and what to do about it.

There is too much going on in the room

It’s so easy to fill your kid’s rooms with items. After all, you feel they need items like a TV and a computer to keep them entertained. But if there are lots of things in your kid’s room, you are going to find they will struggle to get to sleep at night. After all, they are going to want to get up and play with their items. And it can make their brain alert if there are lots of things in the room. Therefore, keep the number of items in the room to a minimum to ensure your child gets enough sleep at night. Devices should stay downstairs to ensure your child isn’t tempted to play with them during the night!

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They aren’t in a comfortable bed 

Your child might also not be getting much sleep as they aren’t comfortable in bed. It could be causing them to move around in the night. Therefore, work out what about the bed is causing them to feel uncomfortable. It might be that the mattress needs to be replaced. After all, if it’s not supporting your child properly, they could end up waking up in the night. Or it might be the actual bed frame which is not providing them much comfort when they are trying to sleep. If you need to get them a new bed, you can find kids beds from Cuckooland and other brands online that might be suitable. And remember to check their duvet and pillows to ensure they are providing them with comfort in the night. That way, you can ensure their bed doesn’t cause them to have a lack of sleep!

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There is too much light in the room

You might not realize that the light in the room can make our brain think it’s morning. And then we struggle to get back to sleep once our brain is alert. Therefore, to stop this happening to your kid, you need to make sure the bedroom is dark enough at night. Invest in good curtains which will stop light getting into your child’s room. And if they can’t sleep without any light, you should just get a night light which you can put in the corner of the room. Therefore, it will give your child some reassurance without there being too much light in the room.

And remember to make sure your little one isn’t eating and drinking much before going to bed. Otherwise, your child will struggle to get any shut eye, and you will have a grumpy kid the next day!

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Thursday, November 10, 2016



With the extensive application of mobile technologies, every parent’s mind is overwhelmed with the question: Whether to snoop or not to snoop their kids’ online activities. While countries like UK have advisors like who are urging parents to monitor their children’s emails, U.S. on the other hand is yet to get over the Edward Snowden crisis. It’s unfortunate that there isn’t much that we see government doing about kids’ online safety, and that’s why parents have to ask themselves whether it’s all right to monitor their kids’ online world.

The breach of trust, which is a possibility with spying on our kids, is in fact contingent upon how we define ‘spying in the first place”.

People have dramatically varying views about what’s the appropriate behavior for monitoring kids’ online behavior. Monitoring kids’ mobile-phone-related activities is pertinent nowadays to keep them safe against online predators, harassers, bullies, and unsolicited access to pornographic content. And sadly, the risks are uncountable, but the solutions are very limited. 


Natasha Furijanic, who has an eight-year-old son, says that monitoring may sound like intruding with our kids’ privacy, but it’s actually equivalent of saving their lives.On the contrary, mothers like Angelica, who is an educational psychologist believes that she would never spy on her daughter, because “that’s a violation of trust and an invasion of privacy”.

There are both easy and hard ways to find what’s there on your children’s computers, cell phones and tablets, but most parents who do spy on their kids’ online activity use tools like email spying software, because it’s an easy and convenient way of doing that. 

“I use xnspy email spying software to monitor my kids’ emails from his cell phone. The app is really convenient and easy to use, because all I had to do was to download it onto my son’s smartphone to start monitoring”, says Monica, mother of three. 


Day, who is the author of “Her Next Chapter” believes that spying on kids is an easy way of sabotaging the parent-child relationship. Her book talks about the mother-daughter bonding and reflects on the beliefs of openness and trust that parents and kids should have with each other.


While there are numerous ways to monitor our kids’ emails and online activity, the most convenient way for parents is to use an email spying software. These apps can be easily installed onto a cell phone; all parents have to do is to download the app onto the device they wish to monitor.


“It’s usually presumed that kids would retaliate to the idea of being monitored, but what really bugs them is the intrusion and constant questioning. I am using an app to monitor my kids and they are perfectly fine with it; they like the idea that I can check on their GPS location, contacts or multimedia without having to ask them for their device or calling them. It’s simple if you know how to bargain with your kids. They need to know that why digital safety matters, and when parents are able to do that, using a monitoring app on their phones is not a big deal then”, added Monica. 

But not every child thinks like that of Monica’s; there are parents who do think that monitoring kids’ email or smartphone is a breach of their privacy, and if there is something they should be doing, it’s to ask them about it. 

“I think parents should rather just focus on providing their kids the digital education they need. I don’t want an app to snoop into my phone; I want my privacy. There are things that aren’t risky but embarrassing and that’s why parents don’t need to know them. If we know the risks, we could be careful”, says Joe, a high school student. 

Apps like https://xnspy.com/ have been in the limelight for their pros and cons. Where kids find it intrusive, parents find this IM chat spying app highly convenient to keep check on the digital safety of their kids. 

What do you think about the use of mobile spying software on your kids’ electronic devices? Let me know in the comments.

Monday, July 25, 2016

My Grandson Receives His First Sacrament

24 July 2016.

It was a very special day. My grandson, Alfonso Miguel, a.k.a. "Amo" was baptized. He was welcomed into the Christian world by family, friends, and 18 pairs of godparents. 

It took months of planning and saving up for the special occasion. Today I am sharing with you photos of this memorable event.
The invitation
I was the one who designed this invitation using a template from Canva.

The Immaculate Conception Cathedral
My daughter and her husband decided to have their son baptized at the Immaculate Conception Cathedral in Quezon City. This was the same church where my daughter was baptized 30 years ago. The ceremony was held in a hall behind the main church, called the Baptism Chapel. 

The Altar in the Baptism Chapel
Children who were scheduled for baptism had to arrive wearing nothing but a diaper. Only a white blanket is allowed to keep the baby warm. 

My daughter Kristine and her son, Amo
The priest started the ceremony by asking all the godparents to form a line and take turns giving Amo their blessing by placing a sign of the cross on his forehead. This took a while to finish, considering he had 18 pairs of godparents!

My youngest son, Mickey was one of Amo's godparents
After all the godparents were done giving him blessings, it was time for the priest to proceed with the Baptism.

Amo receives his First Sacrament

The priest places a sign of the cross on his forehead and gives him his blessings

Amo seems to be listening intently to what the priest was saying
The priest then instructs Amo's parents to put clothes on him, as he has already been cleansed of original sin. Amo's father, Adi then proceeds to light a candle from the main altar. He passes it on to light the candles of the godparents as they renew their Baptism vows. 

The priest gives his final blessing and says, "Welcome to the Christian world, Alfonso Miguel!" Applause and cheers filled the hall. Everyone was happy to be witness to this special occasion.

The proud parents
Amo with his godfathers
Amo with his godmothers

The Baptismal party was held at Dad's World Buffet. The function room was filled with over a hundred guests and well-wishers! Everyone had an awesome time and happy tummies. The food was superb! We got to sample dishes from all over the world. Of course, I can't go home without trying out the dessert bar! It was just sad that taking photos of the food was not allowed. No regrets though. 





It was definitely a memorable event. Of course, my mom would not end the day without a photo op with her great grandson.


Thanks for spending time viewing our photos! Wishing you all a great week ahead.

Welcome to the Christian world, Amo! 
May God keep you and guide you as you go through the journey of life.

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Loving this Grand-parenting Thing!

We are proud grandparents of two beautiful children, Alfonso Miguel and Laina Marie. 

Last June 6th, our grandson turned 6 months! He's starting on solid food and has quite an appetite! He loves mashed potatoes and carrots and broccoli. We give him a little bit of cereal mixed in with the veggies. No complaint from him. He loves his meals. 

He went swimming last week and enjoyed the water. Michael Phelps in the making? Hope so.


Yesterday, our granddaughter turned 6 years old. Our pretty little Laina is growing up to be a very beautiful little lady. She'll be in first grade this coming school year and is excited to be in "big girl" school. Laina loves swimming too! She's taking lessons and is getting to be very good at it.


These two angels make our hearts full of joy, our lives complete. 

To hear those little voices calling us "Grammi" and "Pappy" is enough to make us love being grandparents! 



Sunday, May 22, 2016

Reading is a good habit for children to learn at an early age. From the first few months after birth, babies greatly benefit when their parents read to them. As the child goes into the toddler stage, they learn to appreciate a storybook. The habit of reading has been proven to help increase a child's academic aptitude.

However, what if you notice your child struggling with reading and comprehension? They may not openly admit, but their report cards would show it. If the parents find this frustrating, it is even more frustrating for the child.

As parents, we only want the best for our children. Helping them to reach their dreams is our penultimate goal. 

Where do we start?

Start at the core - help them improve their reading and comprehension skills. Once this has been achieved, the child will have more confidence in themselves and excel in other academic subjects too. 

I understand that we need to make a living and run a household, which leaves not enough time for us to sit down and help a child improve his reading ability. An option is to hire a tutor. But that would burn a big hole in the budget. We can also check downloadable apps to encourage a child to read, however, most of them are not interactive, which makes the child lose interest.

Have you heard of Reading Buddy Software™? If not, then read on.

"Reading Buddy Software™ is advanced speech recognition technology that listens, responds, and teaches as your child reads. It’s like having a tutor in your computer"

How does it work? Watch this:



Amazing, huh?

Reading Buddy Software™ improves reading fluency through repetition. It listens and responds when your child reads. It is user friendly and highly interactive. A child can navigate through the program and earn "prizes" for a job well done.

The stories are fun and engaging, making it easy for the child to be eager and interested to keep on reading. Their reading and comprehension skills will definitely show marked improvement in as little as three months!


This summer, give your child a gift that would give them a brighter future. Purchase the Reading Buddy Software™ today and take advantage of a 50% discount by clicking the link below:



Note: This post contains affiliate links.

Monday, April 18, 2016

A Letter To My Son On His Graduation Day

Hi.

Today you donned your graduation robe and mortarboard. I was the happiest person on the planet. Probably happier than you. 

Today was the culmination of your four years of hard work. You have earned your Bachelor's degree in Hotel Management. Congratulations, Mickey!


My second college graduate. My youngest child. You are now a grown man, equipped with skills to make your mark in your chosen field.

Where did all the years go? It was just yesterday that you were a baby. Always quiet, forever content with a few toy cars and building blocks. You had your share of childhood accidents. That scar on your forehead will always remind you that jumping off a chair was never a good idea.

Did you know how much my heart broke when I left to work abroad? I remember you reached out to hug me before I went in the check in counter at the airport. I pinched your nose and ruffled your hair. I remember saying, "Be a good boy always." How I wished I could have said, "I love you" instead.

Remember the times we used to disagree when you showed lack of interest in your studies? That was when you were in high school. You kept telling me, "I don't want to go to school anymore. My classmates keep teasing me because I can't catch up with the lessons. My teachers keep screaming at me. I'm dumb. I'm not like my siblings. I'm just that. Dumb."

You are not dumb. It was just that time when your siblings were doing very well in school. I did not compare you with them. Each one of you is unique. I never lost hope. I knew we'd find a solution. It took three transfers to different schools before you finally found your confidence. The right school and a pair of prescription glasses and you were back on the right path. 

Another four years after that, here we are, at the Philippine International Convention Center. My heart was full of joy as I watched you get up that stage and accept your diploma. To witness your graduation was enough to forget decades of working the graveyard shift to earn money for your education.



May I ask you for one thing? Just one thing. 

Never forget the people who helped you to get to this day. No, they do not want you to repay them with material things. All they need is a heartfelt "Thank you for believing in me and supporting me through all these years."

Fly high, anak. 

I love you.


Thursday, February 18, 2016

Awesome Baby Shower Gifts



If you know someone who is expecting, you need to get them the perfect baby gift. Just think that the gift you present them at the baby shower could make their first days as a parent bearable. Wouldn’t that be something! All joking aside, it is always a nice gesture to give them a gift that they can use or cherish when the baby arrives. If you don’t know where to begin, the thought could fill you with dread. Luckily, there are a few ideas below that will help you in your time of need.

Baby Shoes

Baby shoes are great because every baby needs to protect their tiny feet no matter their age. Plus, tiny shoes are adorable! If they are expecting a boy, go for something a little more mannish. And, if they are expecting a girl, go for something pink and shiny. It is not rocket science, but it will make all of the difference in the long-run.

A Personalized T-shirt

You can put anything on a personalized t-shirt, which makes them a blank slate. An easy but effective message is something like ‘My Mom Is Awesome!’ or something along those lines. If that slogan doesn’t float your boat, visit Zoey's Attic for ideas and designs. A t-shirt is a nice idea because it is a constant reminder of your gift. Gifts should be something that is functional and fun, just like personalized clothing.

A Photo Album

With the new arrival on the way, the doting couple may lose sight of the past. Although no one wants to live in the past, it is always nice to remember the good times. Thanks to a photo album, they can always remember their life before the baby. And, you can leave space towards the end so that they can create new memories with the new arrival. All you have to do is get hold of a photo album and a collection of old pictures that you can put in the book. There is no better gift than a thoughtful one that doesn’t cost a fortune!

A BabyBjorn

Okay, what is a BabyBjorn? A BabyBjorn is a baby carrier that you see lots of parents wearing. They are an awesome piece of Swedish engineering that makes going out with a little one ten times easier. Instead of pushing a pram around all day, the mother can strap the BabyBjorn to the front and fit the child comfortably inside. The great thing is that it is also comfortable for the wearer. You can bet that almost every new mother will secretly wish that someone buys them one of these gifts. Go on, make their wish a reality.

A Baby Bag

Babies may only be small, but they need a lot of stuff. Instead of adding to their stuff, give them something that will help them carry it around. Without a baby bag, the mom won’t be able to leave the house without the fear of leaving something essential behind. Thanks to a bag, they can go about their normal lives with their young child in tow.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

I am a proud grandmother to Alfonso Miguel. He was born on the 6th of December 2015. I have never felt so complete!

Holding my baby's baby in my arms gives me that overwhelming feeling of joy that is just so surreal.

He recently turned one month old and my daughter and her husband had a big clock digitally printed on a huge tarp. They laid the baby down on the tarp exactly on the part where it says "1."

We took lots and lots of pictures and I used this free online slideshow maker called Kizoa to put together a mini slideshow. It did not take long at all. I had a professional looking slideshow finished in 20 minutes or less!

Here's the finished product: 


I am so loving this grand-parenting thing! I know I will be taking will be tons and tons of pictures to document his every milestone, and I will definitely be making more slideshows!

If you have lots of pictures from a memorable trip, or just family pictures you would like to view over and over again, I would suggest you make a movie clip or slideshow out of them. At Kizoa, everything is fast and easy! Just drag and drop your photos, add animations or transitions and your choice of background music!

Hope you all enjoyed the slideshow. Isn't he a cutie? 

Read about my journey as a grandmother in my other blog entitled, "From Parent To Grandparent."

Friday, January 15, 2016

7 Ways to Help Your Child Get Over A Break-Up

Going through a break up is an unpleasant experience. I am sure most, if not all. experienced it at least once in the past.  My first marriage was not successful and I was more than relieved when the father of my children left. I was alone in my task of raising three kids. I stood firm and moved on. I wouldn’t be sitting here writing this article if I did not pull myself out of the rut I was in.

Strong momma. That’s what my friends have always known me to be.

I am a mother of three, a daughter and two sons. My daughter is married and has a son. I would say that she found herself a good husband. However, it is a different story with my two sons. They have been in and out of failed relationships. I’ve seen how they’ve had their hearts broken. I’ve seen their tears, their frustration, and the loss of self-esteem.

I’ve seen them through their pain, and it hurts me so much to see them suffer.

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If your child is going through a break up, how would you handle it? Here are some tips a strong momma should do:

1.       Stop the blame.
Do not find fault in either your child or his/her girlfriend/boyfriend. Remember that before the break-up, they were so much in love with each other. Bad-mouthing the other party will only bring more pain.

2.  Let the feelings flow.
Crying does not make your son less of a man. The same goes with your daughter. Crying will allow them to let go of the pain.
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3.  Empathize
Be the person willing to listen to what they have to say, no matter how senseless it may seem. Teens and young adults going through a break up tend to talk about the issue incessantly and they need someone to listen. Be there when they need to talk. Hold their hand and hug them. Be understanding when they don’t feel like talking yet. Always reassure them of your love.

4. Exercise and Endorphins
If you child enjoyed sports before the break up, encourage them to get back on track. Better yet, plan a family activity – hiking, a trip to the beach, even riding the bike a few times around the block. Exercise can stimulate the brain to release endorphins, also known as the “feel-good” hormone. An increased level of endorphins in the blood can lessen the physical manifestations of pain and therefore, your child will be able to manage stress better.

5. Prepare his/hers favorite healthy meals
Exposure to stress can give rise to poor eating habits, which in turn may give rise to disturbances in the body’s function.  Make sure he/she follows a regular eating schedule. Treat him/her to their “comfort food” - a bowl of chicken soup, a cup of hot cocoa, their favorite casserole or pasta dish.

6. Let them get enough sleep

Make your child realize that staying up will not change the situation there are in. A good night’s sleep will help repair the body, and make their thought process function better. When my child suffered his first break up and had trouble sleeping, I made him do this simple trick to fall asleep. I told him to lay on his back, arms on his side and legs straight. I told him to imagine that he is a sandbag and that the tips of his fingers and toes have little holes in them and the sand slowly escapes through those holes. I told him to concentrate and imagine that the sand slowly escaping represents all the hurt and pain he is feeling. It worked wonders for him. 

7. Be Positive
Be the "C" mom he/she expects you to be - cool, calm, collected. Remind him/her that everything happens for a reason, and that is what they need to find out. Encourage them to meet new people. Help them regain their confidence in themselves. Let them know that jumping into another relationship, just to spite their ex is not a good move. Let them heal their wounds first, pick up the broken pieces and be whole once more. The best advice I got from my parents was "Love yourself first. When you learn to do this, you will be able to love others." I use the same advice for my children, and I usually tweak it with, "Someone on this earth was born for you to love and love you back. Find that person. Be happy."

I know raising kids is not an easy task. Just take a step or two back and look at the issue from a wider perspective. Count to 10. Breathe. Relax.

Trust God. Everything will be fine.

Monday, November 2, 2015

A Real Life Halloween Scare

31 October 2015.

My son Aton, left home to fetch his girlfriend Marga from their school dorm. They had a few days off from school because of the holidays, so Marga decided to spend it at her parents' house in Marikina City. Marga had her cellphone, laptop, books and other personal stuff in her bag. Aton had his laundry, cellphone and external hard drive in his.

They were trying to get a cab from Cubao to Marikina but the line was so long and it was getting late. So they decided to take public transporation. They hailed a jeepney going to Marikina instead.

In the vicinity of the TIP campus in Aurora Blvd, traffic turned really bad. Marga took this opportunity to send a text message to her father to let him know where she is. 

If you are a Filipino and live in Metro Manila, you would probably guess what happened. Here is Marga's Facebook post narrating the incident:

Today I kind of realized that Aton Layno is my life hero.
Yes he has saved me from a lot of things, but it was on this day, on this specific event that he actually risked his life for something important to me. So, we rode a jeepney in Cubao going to my home because: (1) there were no UV Express van in sight (2) the taxi line was kinda long and we already wanted to go home because it was already late. We approached a stop light around Anonas area, just past T.I.P. Traffic was bad in the area and the jeepney was barely moving. It was at this time that I took the opportunity to take my phone out of my bag and text my Dad to let him know where I was....
My phone was out of my bag, in my hands for a good 2 minutes BEFORE SOME KID OUTSIDE THE JEEP SNATCHED IT AWAY FROM MY HANDS. LIKE WTF! I couldn't do anything because I was so shocked at what just happened. Aton, on the other hand, didn't think for a second, and leaped out of the jeepney and ran after the kid!!!!! He would always tell me he'd do such things but I never actually realized he could actually do it. I was so scared for Aton because I know kids like those usually have buddies with them, I feared Aton would be hurt or soemthing, so I ran after him too . I did not even remember me losing my shoes, because there I was, running, BAREFOOT, ON THE STREETS. I was shouting at the top of my lungs, calling our for Aton not to chase the snatcher anymore. In my confusion, I left our bags (with my laptop in it) in the jeepney. I don't know why I actually did that, but all I could think about was if Aton was going to be okay. I stopped running when I could no longer find them and found my way back to the jeepney. Thank God the traffic was so bad that the jeep hardly moved, and that the lady inside the jeepney kept our bags safe. In the jeepney, all I could do was cry and think of was Aton, where he is, what's happening. I wasn't thinking about my phone or my laptop or whatever, I was just thinking about Aton. After a minute later (which felt like an eternity), he came back.... WITH MY PHONE IN HIS HANDS. 
This isn't the first time he retrieved a lost phone of mine, and I am so grateful for his actions. I have learned my lesson, I promise. Thank you so much, and I'm sorry you got so dirty from chasing the snatcher. And I'm sorry you lost your brother's cap because of this.  I'm super going to pay for it, I promise. 
THANK YOU LORD ATON IS SAFE, That's the most important thing.
When my son came home and told us about what happened, I had mixed feelings. I was proud of him because he was courageous and was ready to defend his lady-love from evil doers, but I was also angry because he should not have put his life on the line for a phone.

My hubby said the same thing. "I am proud of you. Your mother and I made sure we did not raise pussies. But when you get to situations like this, don't piss me off by running after a robber who snatched a dang phone. It is a phone! It can be replaced. You life won't. Remember that."

Aton and Marga
Why do I write about this?

Because I want to share it so you may be more aware of the evil lurking around us. It is always better to be street smart. There are so many different modi operadi that these people use to take advantage of the old, the helpless and the naive. 

This is also to make us aware of the "fight or flight" reaction that we feel when we come face to face with adversity. There is no more "think before you act," because once we start pumping adrenalin, all we do is act on impulse. 

Moral of the post: Stay safe and be smart.

Oh, BTW, Marga almost lost her Samsung Galaxy S6 Edge+.

Sunday, August 23, 2015

This Is For You, My Future Daughter-In-Law

Dear Future Daughter-In-Law,

Let me introduce myself. I am your future Monster-In-Law. 

I am the person who carried your boyfriend in my womb for nine months. I was the one who nurtured him, fed him, potty trained him. I was the one who took him to school and back, stayed up late watching over him when he was sick. I was the one he called when he was happy or sad. It was my pinky finger he held on to at night until he was fast asleep. When he was little, he would always come home from school with a surprise for me - a piece of candy, some left over soda or half a cupcake. He sat with me on the couch while I watched my favorite soap opera. He was my baby boy.


Until he met you. 

And everything changed. Rarely do we talk anymore. He comes home late at night. You say he is your night in shining armor. I think otherwise. You treat him like a slave, waiting on the wings to serve your every whim. He commutes several miles to bring you a jacket to cover your butt because you had a strike-through during one of your monthly periods. Let me ask you this - how often do you change pads? Once a day?!! My goodness! Any girl would know how often you should do that. And why did you have to wear white jeans? Arrrggghhh!!! My son went out in a thunderstorm because you had to call him for "help." 

He loves you, but do you love him?

He stays with you every weekend. He cleans your dorm, scrubs your toilet, and cooks a meal for you. Lucky you! He never does that for me anymore. His room at home is a mess, he uses the toilet like he does not care if he leaves the floor wet, and he only comes downstairs when it is time to eat. He dumps a hamperful of dirty clothes, expecting me to wash them for him. He tells me he has no time to do his laundry because he has to run out to meet you. If ever he is at home, he spends most of his free time on the computer, chatting with you. Why can't he chat with me too? There are many things I want to share, stories I want to tell, but it is all about you! You want this, you need this, you want to go there, you demand him to be near. Have you ever thought that I need some time with my son too?

What kind of spell did you cast upon my boy? Witch.

Are you ready for a life with my son? You'll have to remember, you will not only marry my son, but you will marry the entire family - and that includes ME. 

My boy chose you, and for me to "like" or even "love" you as a daughter, you'd have to seriously consider these:

1. Learn more about Me. I am not a whiner. I don't complain about petty things and I do not rely on anyone to help me out of the rut. I climb, crawl and pull myself out. I am independent. I am handy. I am tougher than you think I am.

2. You should know how to cook. I don't want my boy to come running home to me because you burned the pot roast. You should know how to work your way in the kitchen.

3. You should be patient with his mess.

4. You should give my boy some alone time with his buddies.

5. Do not, I said DO NOT be poking around in his wallet. That is the only thing private in a marriage.

6. Do not nag. You may argue, but no nagging. Respect begets respect.

7. Do not hurt my boy. If you hurt him, I may, or I will hurt you too. Remember, I did not raise him to be a helpless victim of your bullying.

8. You must do everything within your means be a good mother to your future children. Remember, they are my grandchildren. There are times that you will lose your patience with them, but then again, do not hurt them. Because if you do, I may, or I will hurt you too.

9. Do not try to please me with fancy gifts. It is not my nature to want those things. Practicality is my game. I would rather have long walks and worthwhile talks with you to get to know you better.

10. Every now and then, you will receive unsolicited advice from me. It is not that I am meddling in your life, but I am after your welfare. I will not be speaking of things I read from a book or from an online article. I will be speaking to you out of experience.

You have to know Me. I am very transparent. My facial expression and body language is all you need to understand how I feel.

WYSIWYG. (What You See Is What You Get)

So, future daughter-in-law, did I scare you enough? I hope not. These are things I want you to understand and accept. You will spend the rest of your life with my boy and I am the first-hand authority on everything you need to know about him. I am his very first "Wonder Woman" - until he met you. But for now, be content with the title "Wonder Girl." 


I hope you remember all these as you walk down the aisle in a white dress, ready to exchange vows with my boy. 

I will be witnessing your solemn marriage and try my best not to smirk. Haha.

Don't forget to thank me for raising the Man of Your Dreams. I will be out of the picture soon. He will leave the life with me and start a new one with you. My son chose you to love, so I guess I love you too. 

Best regards,

Your future Monster-in-Law