Voices

Credits: www.kleinmeli.deviantart.com

I am the stepson.

I have been emotionally and physically abused by my own father. I am happy he is no longer around. I find it hard to trust people. To compensate for all those years of being labeled "stupid and worthless," I joined support groups and immersed myself in athletics. I am in constant need of acceptance and attention, things my father deprived me of. My mom left me and my siblings to work abroad for two years. How I wanted to be with her. When she came back, she found someone to love. I felt alone again. I take my relationships seriously. My subconscious dictates that I should protect the girl I love in every way I can. I am bull-headed because it is only now that I can be myself. I want to explore things, go places and grow into the person I always wanted to be. I sometimes do things all at the same time, leaving most of them unfinished. I live with my mom and her fiancee. He and me sometimes disagree. I don't think he likes me. I have so much pent up emotions that I sometimes just spend time outside, with my friends, or even with my grandma, to avoid a major clash. I feel my mom favors him more than me. 

I am the stepdad.

I have Parkinsons. I am recovering from hip replacement surgery. I am in constant pain everyday. I have a daughter in the US whom I have not been with for 7 years. I get upset when I cannot talk to her on Skype. I have trouble sleeping. It takes hours and hours before I finally fall asleep at night. I get startled by the slightest sound. I hate it when the boys stay up at night and move around the house looking for a cigarette. I depend heavily on my fiancee to help me get around the house, to shower, to eat, to clean up after myself. I feel worthless. I want to help but I could not. I never had a son. This is the first time I experienced being in the same house with two boys in their early 20s. I know they resent it when I tell them to wash their own dishes or to clean the house. I believe they are old enough to help their mom with household chores. I do not know much about Filipino culture, but in the US, kids are assigned chores and are expected to do it. I know my fiancee does not like it when me and her boys disagree. I did not steal their mother away from them. I see it more like me gaining sons and them gaining a father again. 

I am the person in the middle.

I wish you'd be more open with each other about your feelings. Do you know how hard it is to be caught in the middle? I admit, I am tired of doing all these things for all of you. I am sick and tired of doing housework, preparing your meals, washing clothes and attending to your each and every command. I am getting old. I need sleep. I need some rest. I dream of waking up with meals prepared and the clothes washed and hang out to dry. I long for the day I could go on vacation - out in the quiet countryside, close to the beach. Do you know how much I envy you? Being able to go places with every invite? Being able to sit in front of the computer the whole day? Do you feel my anxiety every night I go to work knowing I need to be alert and awake earning my keep while you are at home sleeping? Do you know how it feels to look forward to the weekend to be with you? Do you know of my frustration fighting this thing called Diabetes? I am just about as human as you. I avoid saying/doing bad things to people you consider important in your life. I feel. I understand. I wish there was 3 or 4 more of me so that you don't feel like you have to compete for my attention.

I love you. Each and everyone of you. EQUALLY. 

"Thank you Lord for giving me the strength to go on when all I want to do is to give up."

My Dream Investment: A Waterfront Condo

Condominium living has gained popularity over the past 10-15 years. Young couples, urban professionals, and older individuals who want to downsize favor condominium living because it provides less worry about the upkeep of the property, and the added amenities like a gym, a pool, or a clubhouse.

The purchase of a condominium unit entails detailed market research and planning. Unit size, pricing, location, and parking provisions are some of the first questions asked by a prospective buyer. Before a decision is made, it is best to consult a professional.

I personally prefer a beachfront or waterfront property. One where I can watch the sunset and sunrise from my window or balcony. A place where I can have a good view of the city and the beach, and most of all, it must be close to a supermarket, a church, and a hospital. There's no where else I could fulfill all these whims other than Miami! 

I searched online for miami condos for sale and found that there are a lot of listings that you can choose from. Properties that would suit your budget, or personal specifications regarding location, size of unit, added amenities and parking allocations. It is amazing to think that purchasing real property nowadays is not as stressful as it was years ago. 

My suggestion before making that big investment is to do your research, conduct an actual site visit, ask the potential neighbors, and speak only with a professional real estate agent. 

Happy hunting! 

Enjoy A Box of Sweets and Fly Round Trip To Paris Free!

A bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates and sweets are common gifts for women for every occasion. I would understand about flowers - it really is a girl thing. What about chocolates? Men go crazy for chocolates and sweets too, and it does not make them less of a man if they do indulge in these treats.

Father's day is barely two weeks from now. Working a full time job, running the household, taking care of the children would leave the wifey very little time to come up with a gift idea. that would be appreciated by her husband. 

My suggestion? Why not satisfy his sweet tooth? After all, there's truth to the saying "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." So, ladies, head on over to #Taste for Sweets and purchase a gift box for your man and watch his face break into a wide smile, just like a happy little boy. And while you're at it, go ahead and purchase more boxes for your brother, your dad, or your male best friend. Treats from around the world in a box delivered right on the recipient's doorstep. Best part of it, its hassle free! Few clicks on the mouse and you're done!

But wait, there's more! Taste for Sweets is giving away a Vacation Package For Two to #Paris, France! This includes round trip airfare for two, a 4 night stay at the Hotel Chambiges Elysees, Paris; $500 dining credit to use at Philippe et Jean-Pierre Restaurant and round trip airport to hotel transportation. 

Sweets, Treats and a Trip. All these at Taste For Sweets.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Benham Rise, Philippines. Officially ours. Officially Filipino.

In April 2012, the United Nations Commission on the Limits of the Continental Shelf has adopted in full the Republic of the Philippines' Submission for an Extended Continental Shelf in the Benham Rise Region. (Source: National Mapping and Resource Information Agency)

Credits: www.globalnation.inquirer.net

The Benham Rise is an underwater plateau, located east of Aurora Province. It total area spans 13 million hectares, roughly about the size of the island of Luzon. The shallowest part of the rise, called Benham Bank is about 50 meters deep while the deepest part is believed to be about 3000 meters deep. A team of scientists have already began exploring the site and have been amazed at the underwater beauty. Coral gardens abound in unbelievably crystal clear waters. They have started collecting samples to conduct further studies and exploration

Marine scientist Cesar Villanoy, the leader of the Benham Rise Program said in an interview on Solar News that they were "seeing things that no other human has ever seen before." They were the first to explore the undersea plateau believed to be a rich source of natural gas.

Credits: www.philstar.com

Extensive exploration of the site is expected to be very expensive. Our local resources are not equipped with the appropriate technology to conduct research in the new territory. The Philippine government will have to find means to propel the research program forward.

For now, we can sit back, relax and revel in this blessing that we have a new territory with the potential of uplifiting our economy.

Benham Rise, Philippines. Officially ours. Officially Filipino.

Suggested readings:

The Philippine Star - http://www.philstar.com/headlines/2014/06/02/1330219/filipinos-chart-new-territory-collect-data-benham-rise
National Mapping and Resource Information Agency (NAMRIA) - http://www.namria.gov.ph/benham.aspx

Tasty Treats For A Cause

Have you ever wondered how treats, snacks and chocolate from another country taste like? Did you ever come across these goodies in a grocery store but did you were not sure if you'd be satisfied with the taste? Are you willing to spend thousands of dollars just to go abroad to sample these treats?

Its time to put an end to your worries and satisfy your cravings. At Taste For Sweets, you will get your own box of curated snacks and treats from around the world delivered to your doorstep monthly. The company has a team of travelers and food enthusiasts that put these snacks together and assure the recipient of discovering new and pleasant tastes from countries you wish you could visit. It is a whole new experience for your palate to enjoy and for your family and friends as well.

Subscription for your monthly box of treats is $16, which is not bad, considering the price you'd if you'd buy these snacks per piece. Taste For Sweets also offers gift boxes that you can purchase to send to family and friends on special occasions. Whichever you choose, shipping is always free.

By purchasing a box from Taste For Sweets, you are also helping them help others in need. Every box or item purchased equates to a donation made to several non-profit organizations that are currently working to provide communities in South Asia, Africa and Central America access to safe, clean water. Think about it. While you're enjoying your snacks, you are helping someone to have safe and clean water.

Here is a bonus for you. I am giving you promo codes to avail of a big 25% discount when you sign up. (Please use all caps when typing in the promo code)

TASTEFORSWEETS25

(Receive 25% OFF when signing up for the monthly subscription plans)

GIFTOFSNACKS25

(Receive 25% OFF when placing an order for one of the gift box options)

Come on and start your journey of discovering wonderful, tasty treats from around the globe. Just click on the Taste for Sweets banner on the upper right side of your screen to sign up and don't forget to type in the promo code! 

The Debutante: The Baby Is Now A Fine Young Lady

Last May 18, my niece celebrated her 18th birthday. As Filipino culture dictates, children celebrate three "milestone" birthdays.  Its their 1st birthday, their 7th, and their 18th (for girls) or their 21st (for boys). Most parents go out of their way to throw a big party for their children during these times. 

In the Philippines, a girl's 18th birthday or debut party calls for a grand celebration. The debutante is ushered and introduced to society as a young woman. Family and friends take turns giving gifts and wishing the debutante happiness and blessings in this new chapter in her life. In Latin American countries, the "Quiceañera" is a similar practice and is celebrated on a girl's 15th birthday. 

My niece, Bianca is my sister's only child. As expected, my sister arranged a lavish debut party for her daughter. Preparations started six months prior to the event which turned out to be a success! Everyone had a great time, specially the debutante, who specifically requested to have the venue decorated "Bohemian Style" with dream catchers hanging on the main entrance. The event planners really did a good job. The make up artist made Bianca look like a princess on her special night. The food was superb and the beer was overflowing. A true unforgettable moment.

I am sharing with you pictures of my niece's party. Our little Bianca has indeed blossomed into a beautiful woman. 

Bianca's Bohemian inspired attire.

Bianca's first dance with her proud daddy

Waiting for the actual ceremony to start

Smile for the camera!

With her parents

The venue - Valle Verde 6 Country Club in Pasig City

The venue before the guests arrived

The three-tiered birthday cake

THE FAMILY

The Grandmama and the Debutante

My Mom, my youngest sister, her husband and two kids Trey and Tyra

My only brother and his girlfriend


(L-R) Adi (my daughter's boyfriend); my daughter Kristine and their common friend

Nieces, nieces galore! (L-R) Abby, Hannah, my daughter Kristine and Inna

My sons Mickey (L) and Aton (R)

My sister's youngest child Tyra (L) and her cousin


THE WELL-WISHERS

THE "ME" PICTURES

 Me and my Poppa bear

 Me and my wacky cousin, Joyce

 Me and my brother

My big bear hug!

I hoped you enjoyed looking at the pictures of our family's big event this 2014. The next debutante in the family would be Tyra.. 8 more years from now. :-)

P.S. Here's Bianca's AVP: 

Nick Nemeth on "Facing an IRS Dispute? Three Reasons Why You Need a Tax Attorney on Your Team"

Nick Nemeth has recently written a blog entitled “Facing an IRS Dispute? Three Reasons Why You Need A Tax Attorney on Your Team” on his web page www.myirsteam.com. Nick Nemeth is the founder of The Law Offices of Nick Nemeth, PPLC, a respected Dallas Tax Law Firm that focuses on providing tax services for individuals and businesses in the Dallas area.

Every year, taxpayers are faced with stress and anxiety when it comes to filing their taxes. The Tax Law being so complicated, can make the entire process a difficult task. Despite every effort to comply with all the rules and guidelines, taxpayers are left with a feeling of confusion and helplessness. The fear of having someone at your doorstep introducing themselves as "working for the IRS" can literally make you break up in cold sweat.

The IRS is one of the most feared government agency. Individual taxpayers and some businesses are still in limbo when it comes to knowing each and every detail of the Tax Law. This is what the IRS relies on - taxpayer confusion.

Most members of the workforce spend their time making a living for themselves, and are dead tired when they get home. They rarely have time to keep abreast of the amendments to the Tax Law, only to find out too late that they have made a mistake in filing their taxes. The unpleasant experience of having to subject themselves to audits or IRS disputes can lead to incorrect or inconsistent responses.

This is the reason why taxpayers should not face the IRS alone. A Tax Attorney can definitely help to avoid dealing with IRS disputes. The Law Offices of Nick Nemeth, founded by Dallas Tax Attorney Nick Nemeth offers their services to put an end to our IRS disputes. For the past 15 years and counting, Nick Nemeth and his team have helped thousands of individual taxpayers and business overcome their fear of filing taxes. Educating their clients about taxpayer rights and privileges sets them apart from other firms in the business. This alone is a major leap in overcoming the stress of tax filing season. Their personalized service and expertise in the subject provide their clients that much needed peace of mind.

Read more about Nick Nemeth and his team at www.myirsteam.com, or, if you are a resident of the Dallas/Fort Worth area, you can drop by their office at:

The Law Offices of Nick Nemeth

2727 LBJ Freeway Suite 806

Dallas, TX
75234

Contact Phone Number: 972-484-0829

Walk the Talk: Leadership by Example

"I think that the best training a top manager can be engaged in is management by example. I want to make sure there is no discrepancy between what we say and what we do. If you preach accountability and then promote somebody with bad results, it doesn't work. I personally believe the best training is management by example. Don't believe what I say. Believe what I do." - Carlos Ghosn, CEO of Renault-Nissan

Powerful words.

In the corporate world, we have to learn and accept that not all bosses are in there to help you up the ladder of success. Some are slave drivers, some are slackers, some just happen to be a boss because their parents own the company you work for. A handful are real leaders. They rally their team to success and bask in their accomplishments. That is what subordinates dream of - to work with a leader.

How would you know if you're working FOR a "Boss" or working WITH a "Leader?" Here are some quotes from famous people to help you distinguish one from the other.

Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the ONLY thing. 

-Albert Schweitzer

People ask the difference between a leader and a boss. The leader leads and the boss drives. 

- Theodore Roosevelt

There is a difference between being a leader and being a boss. Both are based on authority. A boss demands blind obedience; a leader earns his authority through understanding and trust. - Klaus Balkenhol

Leaders don't boss. They persuade. 

- Wesley K. Clark

The glue that holds all relationships together, including the relationship of the leader and the led is TRUST. And trust is based on INTEGRITY.

- Brian Tracey

A boss says "Go!" A leader says "Let's Go!" 

- E.M. Kelly

In the past, a leader was the boss. Today's leaders must be partners with their people. They can no longer lead solely based on positional power.

- Ken Blanchard

A boss creates fear, a leader confidence. A boss fixes blame, a leader corrects mistakes. A boss knows all, a leader asks questions. A boss makes work drudgery, a leader makes it interesting.

- Russel H. Ewing

Education can't make us all leaders, but it can teach us which leader to follow.

-Bel Kaufman

There is only one boss - THE CUSTOMER. He can fire anybody from the company, from the chairman on down, simply by spending his money somewhere else.

- Sam Walton

To be a leader, you have to make people want to follow you, and nobody wants to follow someone who does not know where he is going.

- Joe Namath

Strategic communication is the core of effective leadership. Through a leader's use of verbal and written symbols, employees are motivated or deflated, informed or confused, productive or apathetic. The leader's ability to carve off the verbal fat and get to the meat of the issue, idea or plan will find success at every turn.

- Reed Markhan, PhD

The wicked leader is one who the people despise. A good leader is one who the people revere. A great leader is he who the people say, "We did it ourselves."

- Lao Tzu

A Mother's Day Gift: 21 Years Ago

21 years ago, on Mother's Day, I gave birth to my youngest child, John Michael Clarence. The tiniest of my three children at birth, Mickey, as he is fondly called, weighed in at 7 pounds 2 ounces, 19 inches in length. He was the most behaved little baby in the nursery room of the hospital. Unmindful of the other crying babies beside him, he would just sleep it off. It is weird, because he still sleeps a lot even though he is a grown man, and he is now the tallest among his siblings. 

Being the youngest child, Mickey is very affectionate. When he was a child, he would only fall asleep if he had his little pinky finger wrapped around my pinky finger. My mom thought he'd grow up to be a priest because we would always see him praying. Every time we would go someplace, he'd start his prayers the minute he got in the car. Now as an adult, he never fails to attend mass every Sunday.

A year and a half ago, I took a funny picture of my two boys doing the exact same pose they had when they were babies. I really have fun looking at their pictures and wonder where all the years have gone.

Time flies! My baby is now 21 years old. Officially an adult. (Now I feel soooooooo old). He's currently in school studying to earn his degree in Hotel and Restaurant Management. He is still the quiet one, and still very affectionate. He loves playing tricks on me and teases me a lot about being old. He is so good with his younger cousins, always looking out for their safety. 

My wish for my son on his 21st birthday is to continue to reach for his dreams, to never lose focus and to be the best that he can possibly be. 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY NOT SO LITTLE BARDAGOOL BOY!

Here's your birthday video! :)

5 Common Misconceptions About Working In A Call Center

I have been working in call centers for almost a decade. For ten years, I have been lacking sleep everyday, depended on a fast food diet, and learned to love coffee so much I could not live without it. 

Being relatively "new" in the employment sector, call center workers have been the subject of discrimination by other members of the workforce. Taking into consideration my tenure in this industry, I can confidently state the common misconceptions of working in a call center.

Call Center workers have lots of money. 

FALSE. Call center agents' basic salary ranges from 15K-20K/month. That's the gross rate. Take from that amount the mandatory government deductions - withholding tax, SSS, Philhealth, Pag-Ibig. A per minute rate of tardiness is also deducted from the gross salary. For those getting 20K/month, the average take home pay per month would be more or less 13K-15K. If the company pays twice a month, then that equates to 6K-7K per pay out. For a single mom with 4 children all in school, that amount would not suffice.

Call centers are the dumping grounds of college drop outs.

FALSE.  There are centers who are "equal opportunity" employers, meaning they do not discriminate against an applicant's educational attainment. High school graduates are even welcome to apply. However, not every Maria, Pedro or Juan can make it through the rigorous examinations. Although there is no particular skill set required, call centers choose those who have impeccable English communication skills, a bubbly personality, a team player, an effective multi-tasker and with a high degree of resistance to stress. 

Call center workers are substandard employees.

FALSE. We often hear the phrase "sa call center lang pala nagtatrabaho" (Oh, she just works in a call center) This annoys me so much, every time I hear someone say it. It is not easy to leave home in the wee hours of the morning, to be the target of robbers, of hoodlums and other ill-doers. It is not easy to stay awake the whole night and try to sleep at noon time. It is not pleasant to be screamed at, cursed, and receive derogatory remarks from someone halfway around the globe. We are put through so much stress everyday but we just take everything with a grain of salt and move on. We work from log in to log out, our breaks are scheduled and timed. And this is what others call substandard?

Call center workers drink like there is no tomorrow.

FALSE. Whoever thought of this should think twice (or more). Seeing a group of agents having after-shift FBs (few beers) is not drinking like there is no tomorrow. They could probably be celebrating someone's birthday, or meeting the team goal for the week, or just wanting to relax after a stressful week. If having a few beers with close friends is an eyesore, what can you say about the shirtless, unemployed big bellied bullies drowning themselves in gin on the sidewalks? Please do not be too quick to judge.

Its an easy job.

FALSE.  Working for a sales account demands that you need to close a certain number of sales PER DAY. Agents have to convince a customer to purchase over the phone. That is NOT easy - to sell something to someone in another country. If agents are not able to meet their sales target for the day, they may be at risk of losing their job. Customer service agents have to be extremely patient and resistant to stress. They have to provide resolution to the customer's issue during the call - and make sure that the customer will not call back with the same issue. Then they have to be within the acceptable range of the call handling time. Some centers require issue resolution in 3 minutes. Financial and credit card collection accounts are even more stressful. 

I work for the Quality Assurance team and it is NOT an easy job. Finding calls, evaluating, preparing reports, calibrations, coaching. The life of the account we support depends on us. It is our task to weed out the non performers and recommend the best improvement plan for them. 

Just like any other job, the key to success is to love what you do. Call centers are not places where people do nothing. We generate revenue to keep this country afloat, we put a lot of sacrifice for our families, to the point of putting our health and safety on the line. 

We deserve more than the senseless phrase - "Sa call center lang pala nagtatrabaho."

Me and my fellow Quality Coaches

Midnight coffee, Birthday pizzas,

Accentuated English, Dashing clothes,

Irate customers, Mood music in cabs,

So much money,but so little time.

Late night parties and sunrise beer.

Crush on Team Leads, The fight for appraisals,

Die hard friendships and tears for love.

Nothing missing, Just everything!

People call it Call centers.

WE CALL IT LIFE.