Walk the Talk: Leadership by Example

"I think that the best training a top manager can be engaged in is management by example. I want to make sure there is no discrepancy between what we say and what we do. If you preach accountability and then promote somebody with bad results, it doesn't work. I personally believe the best training is management by example. Don't believe what I say. Believe what I do." - Carlos Ghosn, CEO of Renault-Nissan

Powerful words.

In the corporate world, we have to learn and accept that not all bosses are in there to help you up the ladder of success. Some are slave drivers, some are slackers, some just happen to be a boss because their parents own the company you work for. A handful are real leaders. They rally their team to success and bask in their accomplishments. That is what subordinates dream of - to work with a leader.

How would you know if you're working FOR a "Boss" or working WITH a "Leader?" Here are some quotes from famous people to help you distinguish one from the other.

Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the ONLY thing. 

-Albert Schweitzer

People ask the difference between a leader and a boss. The leader leads and the boss drives. 

- Theodore Roosevelt

There is a difference between being a leader and being a boss. Both are based on authority. A boss demands blind obedience; a leader earns his authority through understanding and trust. - Klaus Balkenhol

Leaders don't boss. They persuade. 

- Wesley K. Clark

The glue that holds all relationships together, including the relationship of the leader and the led is TRUST. And trust is based on INTEGRITY.

- Brian Tracey

A boss says "Go!" A leader says "Let's Go!" 

- E.M. Kelly

In the past, a leader was the boss. Today's leaders must be partners with their people. They can no longer lead solely based on positional power.

- Ken Blanchard

A boss creates fear, a leader confidence. A boss fixes blame, a leader corrects mistakes. A boss knows all, a leader asks questions. A boss makes work drudgery, a leader makes it interesting.

- Russel H. Ewing

Education can't make us all leaders, but it can teach us which leader to follow.

-Bel Kaufman

There is only one boss - THE CUSTOMER. He can fire anybody from the company, from the chairman on down, simply by spending his money somewhere else.

- Sam Walton

To be a leader, you have to make people want to follow you, and nobody wants to follow someone who does not know where he is going.

- Joe Namath

Strategic communication is the core of effective leadership. Through a leader's use of verbal and written symbols, employees are motivated or deflated, informed or confused, productive or apathetic. The leader's ability to carve off the verbal fat and get to the meat of the issue, idea or plan will find success at every turn.

- Reed Markhan, PhD

The wicked leader is one who the people despise. A good leader is one who the people revere. A great leader is he who the people say, "We did it ourselves."

- Lao Tzu

A Mother's Day Gift: 21 Years Ago

21 years ago, on Mother's Day, I gave birth to my youngest child, John Michael Clarence. The tiniest of my three children at birth, Mickey, as he is fondly called, weighed in at 7 pounds 2 ounces, 19 inches in length. He was the most behaved little baby in the nursery room of the hospital. Unmindful of the other crying babies beside him, he would just sleep it off. It is weird, because he still sleeps a lot even though he is a grown man, and he is now the tallest among his siblings. 

Being the youngest child, Mickey is very affectionate. When he was a child, he would only fall asleep if he had his little pinky finger wrapped around my pinky finger. My mom thought he'd grow up to be a priest because we would always see him praying. Every time we would go someplace, he'd start his prayers the minute he got in the car. Now as an adult, he never fails to attend mass every Sunday.

A year and a half ago, I took a funny picture of my two boys doing the exact same pose they had when they were babies. I really have fun looking at their pictures and wonder where all the years have gone.

Time flies! My baby is now 21 years old. Officially an adult. (Now I feel soooooooo old). He's currently in school studying to earn his degree in Hotel and Restaurant Management. He is still the quiet one, and still very affectionate. He loves playing tricks on me and teases me a lot about being old. He is so good with his younger cousins, always looking out for their safety. 

My wish for my son on his 21st birthday is to continue to reach for his dreams, to never lose focus and to be the best that he can possibly be. 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY NOT SO LITTLE BARDAGOOL BOY!

Here's your birthday video! :)

5 Common Misconceptions About Working In A Call Center

I have been working in call centers for almost a decade. For ten years, I have been lacking sleep everyday, depended on a fast food diet, and learned to love coffee so much I could not live without it. 

Being relatively "new" in the employment sector, call center workers have been the subject of discrimination by other members of the workforce. Taking into consideration my tenure in this industry, I can confidently state the common misconceptions of working in a call center.

Call Center workers have lots of money. 

FALSE. Call center agents' basic salary ranges from 15K-20K/month. That's the gross rate. Take from that amount the mandatory government deductions - withholding tax, SSS, Philhealth, Pag-Ibig. A per minute rate of tardiness is also deducted from the gross salary. For those getting 20K/month, the average take home pay per month would be more or less 13K-15K. If the company pays twice a month, then that equates to 6K-7K per pay out. For a single mom with 4 children all in school, that amount would not suffice.

Call centers are the dumping grounds of college drop outs.

FALSE.  There are centers who are "equal opportunity" employers, meaning they do not discriminate against an applicant's educational attainment. High school graduates are even welcome to apply. However, not every Maria, Pedro or Juan can make it through the rigorous examinations. Although there is no particular skill set required, call centers choose those who have impeccable English communication skills, a bubbly personality, a team player, an effective multi-tasker and with a high degree of resistance to stress. 

Call center workers are substandard employees.

FALSE. We often hear the phrase "sa call center lang pala nagtatrabaho" (Oh, she just works in a call center) This annoys me so much, every time I hear someone say it. It is not easy to leave home in the wee hours of the morning, to be the target of robbers, of hoodlums and other ill-doers. It is not easy to stay awake the whole night and try to sleep at noon time. It is not pleasant to be screamed at, cursed, and receive derogatory remarks from someone halfway around the globe. We are put through so much stress everyday but we just take everything with a grain of salt and move on. We work from log in to log out, our breaks are scheduled and timed. And this is what others call substandard?

Call center workers drink like there is no tomorrow.

FALSE. Whoever thought of this should think twice (or more). Seeing a group of agents having after-shift FBs (few beers) is not drinking like there is no tomorrow. They could probably be celebrating someone's birthday, or meeting the team goal for the week, or just wanting to relax after a stressful week. If having a few beers with close friends is an eyesore, what can you say about the shirtless, unemployed big bellied bullies drowning themselves in gin on the sidewalks? Please do not be too quick to judge.

Its an easy job.

FALSE.  Working for a sales account demands that you need to close a certain number of sales PER DAY. Agents have to convince a customer to purchase over the phone. That is NOT easy - to sell something to someone in another country. If agents are not able to meet their sales target for the day, they may be at risk of losing their job. Customer service agents have to be extremely patient and resistant to stress. They have to provide resolution to the customer's issue during the call - and make sure that the customer will not call back with the same issue. Then they have to be within the acceptable range of the call handling time. Some centers require issue resolution in 3 minutes. Financial and credit card collection accounts are even more stressful. 

I work for the Quality Assurance team and it is NOT an easy job. Finding calls, evaluating, preparing reports, calibrations, coaching. The life of the account we support depends on us. It is our task to weed out the non performers and recommend the best improvement plan for them. 

Just like any other job, the key to success is to love what you do. Call centers are not places where people do nothing. We generate revenue to keep this country afloat, we put a lot of sacrifice for our families, to the point of putting our health and safety on the line. 

We deserve more than the senseless phrase - "Sa call center lang pala nagtatrabaho."

Me and my fellow Quality Coaches

Midnight coffee, Birthday pizzas,

Accentuated English, Dashing clothes,

Irate customers, Mood music in cabs,

So much money,but so little time.

Late night parties and sunrise beer.

Crush on Team Leads, The fight for appraisals,

Die hard friendships and tears for love.

Nothing missing, Just everything!

People call it Call centers.

WE CALL IT LIFE.

My Summers in Araneta Center

In these islands I call home, we find ways to share smiles and happiness everywhere. We may be a country beset by poverty, corruption and devastating natural calamities, but we remain resilient, hard-working, hospitable and fun-loving.

Araneta Center in Quezon City is a large commercial area with major shopping malls, restaurants, cinemas, grocery stores and offices. It has links to two commuter train lines, a bus terminal, and taxi and jeepney depot. It even hosts a "government center," where satellite offices have been set up to assist the general public in securing documents. It is very accessible from where I live, so close that if I am in the mood for exercise, I can reach it by foot or by bike. For me, it is everything in one place. I grew up here, so I guess that makes me an expert on the topic. :)

Photo credits: http://www.manilagateway.com/

In the sweltering heat of the summer, people flocking to Araneta Center get entertained by a dancing traffic policeman. It makes us forget our troubles for a few minutes, turns a frown into a smile, and makes waiting to cross the street more bearable. It is indeed, Filipino talent at its best.

I am sharing a video of our very own "Dancing Policeman of Araneta Center." (Video credits: www.royalmediaent.com. Uploaded in YouTube by Mack Sean)

Its more fun in the Philippines! Enjoy!

22 Years

It is exactly 22 years to the day that I lost my dad to cancer.

22 long years and it still hurts. Images of my dad in his hospital bed in the MICU of the Philippine Heart Center for Asia. The doctors called us all in, saying he would not make it through the day. We sat around his bedside, holding him, just feeling his pain. And then it happened. Right before my eyes, I saw my father convulse and die.

It was the darkest day in my life. I was struck by disbelief. This man who was my real life hero succumbed to such a rapidly progressing disease. My dad was a doctor and did not expect this to happen to him.

All this time, I have slowly learned to accept that Daddy is gone. I am comforted by the thought that he has moved on to a better place where there is no more pain.

Accepting does not mean forgetting. I keep my father's memory alive in my mind. I tell my children stories of fun times I had with my Dad and how he would have enjoyed seeing his grandchildren. It gives me joy in my heart to relive those times. Every time I look up at the night sky and see the vast expanse of the stars and the universe, I know my Daddy is up there in Heaven with God and all his angels. 

On this day of remembering, I pray that God would hold Daddy and tell him how much we love and miss him. I would ask God to tell Daddy that we are okay and not to worry about us. I pray that God would give him a big bear hug for me, and I will give thanks to God for blessing us with a man whom we lovingly call "Daddy."

The Depressed Diabetic: A Fighter Par Excellence

According to the American Diabetes Association, studies show that people with diabetes have a greater risk of depression than people without diabetes. Oh how true!

Let me tell you about the experience from an expert on this vicious cycle of Diabetes and Depression. That person is me.

A month and a half ago, I was put on a new set of medications to lower my unbelievably high sugar levels. My endocrinologist wants to ensure that the excess sugar in my blood will not damage any of my internal organs. I had to alter my diet, get more rest and avoid stress.

I started to tweak my eating habits. I now only have one serving of rice a day (one cup). This means I only have one decent sit-down meal per day. The rest of my meals are spread out as light snacks. I have totally shunned any sugary beverage. I eat more vegetables than I usually do. Instead of empty calorie snacks, I have learned to feast on half an ear of corn or a cup of boiled peanuts. I started to feel better and had more energy. I take my blood sugar reading twice a day - after waking up and another one two hours after my full meal. My glucometer has earned its place in my purse. 

A normal blood sugar reading is 90-105mg/dl. Me? Despite all the dieting and the new medication, the lowest reading I have ever had for the past 6 weeks is 144 mg/dl. Grrr.. Last night at work, my mid-shift meal was a small steamed bun with ground pork filling. I took my meds right after. I started to feel extremely tired and sleepy. This lasted for a good three hours after my meal. I took my blood sugar reading. Unbelievable. 371 mg/dl! 

And so here I am, flung into the depths of depression (again). Despite all my efforts to get my blood sugar down to "acceptable" levels, it just won't budge! I am resisting the urge to drown myself in a tub of ice cream. What the heck! I might as well enjoy the sugar anyway. 

I am now having feelings of anxiety. I have resigned my fate. I know there is no way I will escape being put on insulin. Not only will it be expensive, it would mean I would have to be pricking myself with another gadget. It is just so sad to have this kind of disease. I am the most unwilling recipient of the genetic markers for Diabetes. Worry is starting to set in, fearful of what the future would bring. Would I be dying soon? Who would then take care of my family? Who would cook, clean and do the laundry? Who will send my boys through school? Sigh...

Managing Diabetes can be stressful enough - diet and lifestyle changes, compliance to medication, enhancing weight loss, increasing fitness levels to avoid cardiovascular complications. These alone can lead to depression and the feeling of hopelessness. Once depression sets in, compliance to the self management of diabetes is compromised. 

This is where the vicious cycle begins.

I guess I would be seeing my endocrinologist earlier than scheduled. I have to fight this. If I want to be well, it should start with me and a whole lot of prayers. 

For My Future Children-In-Law

Parenting is the noblest job in the world. No rest days, no overtime pay, no holidays off. Its a 24/7 job, whether or not you are physically present. I was left with the task of raising my kids all on my own when their father turned his back on us. I had to be both mother and father - firm but loving, a role model for my daughter and two sons. That was difficult. Really difficult. 

Photo credits: www.skepticalob.com

I have been blessed to have found someone who helped me through my rough times. We've been together for almost seven years and counting. He gave me valuable advice on how to deal with raising teenagers. He took on the task of being a father to my children.

The children are all grown now. They have found themselves their own "special someones." It gives me joy to see them happy in their relationships. 

Being a parent, I only want the best for my children. Here's my (unsolicited) advice to my children's "special someones."  

1. Love them like you love yourself. My children are not perfect, but they are my treasures. I have nurtured them since the time of their conception. Please remember that. 

2. My children chose you to love. Although it takes some time for me to get used to the idea that I am no longer the center of their world, I am happy that they find happiness in being with you. Trust one another. You'd never go wrong with that. 

3. My children came from a broken family. It is not a disease. Do not take it against them that my relationship with their father did not work out. I did my best to raise them to be morally upright and responsible. 

4. Should you find yourselves disagreeing with something, never go to bed without talking it over. Never meet each other head on, as this will not resolve anything. Be patient with each other. Never ever engage in a fight in front of your children. They do not deserve the trauma.

5. Never forget to respect each other's parents. You will not be where you are if it had not been for your parents. Remember that you will not only marry each other, you will also marry each other's families. 

6. Do not get lost in the task of raising a family. Always set some time for yourselves. Never lose the habit of going out on dates. Some time spent alone - just the two of you, will keep your relationship healthy. I will babysit the (future) grandchildren for you.

7. Marriage is a partnership. Support each other. Draw strength from one another. In this day and time, practicality is the name of the game. 

8. Put God in the center of your lives. Give thanks for the blessings you receive everyday. With Him as the foundation of your family, everything will fall just into the right place at the right time. Pray and pray frequently. 

It may still be quite awhile before these pieces of advice are put into use, however, I'm doing this now when I feel the "wisdom" in me, before my hands curl up to be unusable, before my brain gets eaten up by Alzheimers, and before it is too late to even write or speak.

Parenting is really a never ending job, but I am happy to be blessed with the chance to be a parent. It is the greatest gift!

A Bike Riding Day With My Eldest Boy

It is the first day of my 5-day weekend. Too lazy to do the laundry. Too lazy to do any other household task other than cooking.

The afternoon was dragging on and on and I decided to take a spin around the neighborhood on the bike. The sun was shining but there was a light breeze. Perfect!

My OOTD? Denim cut-off shorts, a t-shirt and flip flops. Off I go...

I must have done 2 or 3 kilometers and headed home. When I got to the gate, my son was waiting for me and had the camera ready. He told me to just go up and down our street so he can take pictures. Of course, I was fine with that. Haha.

 Oh my, it is difficult to pedal upstreet!

 Pedaling down street is better.

 Whoops! Moving vehicle behind me. I have to move closer to the sidewalk.

 Great weather to squeeze in a little exercise!

My Royal Chubbiness!

A panoramic shot. So many images of My Royal Chubbiness!

This is Aton, my eldest son

What's with the pensive pose? 

It is a great day. Tonight will be movie night - Son of God, The Bible, The Passion of Christ. Films to keep my Catholic faith burning. 

Have a blessed Lenten Season, everyone. Peace, Hope, and Love from my family to yours. 

I'm Sexy and I Know It: Mother's Day Gift Idea

Mother's day is just around the corner. It is time to honor that one great woman in our lives - who held us within her belly for 9 months, and holds us in her heart forever.

My mom is easy to please. She loves dining out, or anything red in color. A new shade of lipstick, a red blouse, or sweat pants (for her aerobics dance class), a red purse, even a red coffee cup with her name etched on it. It would be an easy task to find something to make mama smile.

As for me? What would I want this year? The good, angelic side of me says "a good home movie, freshly popped corn and cold beer." The naughty side of me says "Sexy Women's Underwear" I have always liked lace underwear because it is so sexy! I do have a few pieces in my drawer but a new one would be most welcome. I am too shy to ask my hubby to get me some for mother's day so I will leave subtle hints here and there until he finally gets it. I would leave the website Devil's Wink up instead of closing my browser after using the computer. I would pin pictures and bookmark the pages of my choice. I absolutely love the set in the picture. Love the baby blue color! I hope the hubby will notice these little hints. 

Oh, and by the way, he is my number one blog fan. When he reads this post, I am sure I will be getting my lace underwear! Love love love!

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My Three Greatest Fears

Every woman has her fears. No matter how strong a woman seems to be, she has fears that she keeps suppressed and keeps them in the deepest recesses of her mind. She throws her hair back, flashes a smile and moves forward.

I consider myself a very strong woman. I have been through hell and back. I am constantly fighting battles every day from the time I wake up till the time I lay myself to sleep.

I have three greatest fears in life:

"I fear growing old and getting sick with a debilitating illness, with no one to take care of me or my needs." I do not have enough savings in the bank to say to myself that I can live comfortably enough in my twilight years. What if the hubby is not strong enough to help me? What if all my children leave home to start their own families? I would probably just rot in one corner and die quietly.

"I fear going blind." My diabetes has been slowly eating up my eyesight, it seems like it is getting worse every year. How will I write? How will I cook the family's meals? How will I go to work?

"I fear my earthly existence would cease without accomplishing the purpose of me being born in the first place." What is my mission? I know part of it is to raise my kids until they are ready and able to live their own lives. Does my mission end there?

I have spread myself way too thin and it is now taking a toll on me. I know in time, things will get better. I need to face these fears head on. Now is the time to start planning. Now is the time to start that savings plan.

I am confident that my Lord God has given me these trials to hone me into a better individual. Through the roughest times in my life, I have never lost my faith in Him.

As night time slowly creeps in and I get ready for bed, I bow my head and pray:

"And now I lay myself to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

And should I die before I wake

I pray the Lord my soul to take.

AMEN."

Photo credits: www.thecatholicspirit.com