Tuesday, November 21, 2017

As a mother, you can easily become consumed by your kids. Their needs can far outweigh your own, even on the days you feel desperate for a shower, a hot meal and a reassuring hug. From the moment your child is born, you go from being your own person to being accountable for someone else. Their life depends on you, which can be scary and overwhelming as much as it gives you pride. If you have a strong partner with you through the early days of parenthood, then you know that you are lucky. A lot of new moms go through those days pretty much alone. Your days are stuck in the same routine from birth to teenage years, and it can get a little bit wearing! As a parent, you can find yourself becoming increasingly isolated from the people you once called your best friends. Getting onto different paths in life can be sad and leave you feeling alone at a time in your life where you need as much support as possible.

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A support system for a mother is an essential. Good people surrounding you when you are at your most vulnerable point can make a huge difference to the way you do things with your routines and your children. If you’re a seasoned mother, then you know the drill when a friend of yours falls pregnant: you need to be that support. The support system a mom needs should never be underestimated, and the amount of support you as a mom could give another is huge! No mother wants to ask for help; they believe they’re supposed to be doing it all alone and not being able to manage is a sign of weakness. In actual fact, asking for help is a sign of strength and there are many ways that you can help, and be helped, as a parent. We’ve put some of the best ways below for you.

Chores.
Think back to when you first brought your baby home from the hospital. How into the chores were you? Not at all, we bet! A new mother has a tiny new life to get used to, so trying to fit chores in around that new baby, eating, showering and finding time to sleep isn’t easy at all. If you have a friend who is in the middle of a house move, then you know that they can benefit from a service like Pack Mom, and you can get a free quote to find out how other moms can rally around to assist in getting that house packed and ready for a move. There’s so much more a mom needs than flowers and advice – they need the chores done! So, roll up your sleeves and get stuck into the odd jobs.

Time.
If there is one thing that a new mother needs, it’s time. You may remember the drill from when you first became a mom. The hours seemed to melt into each other quickly, so one minute you’re holding the baby, then the sun goes down and you’re still holding the baby. Give your friend a heads up that you are on your way over. When you get there, tidy up, make some dinner and then take the baby off her hands. Give her a chance to go and shower, take a nap and have five minutes with a hot drink. No mom ever thinks about the small things that make them feel more comfortable, and so they let themselves get into a state. Postnatal depression is a real thing, but if you can be the support system your friend needs, you would be, right?

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Photograph.
Did you know that mom is always behind the camera rather than in front of it? If you’re a parent, you’ll already be very aware of this fact. Take a few photos of the new mom in your circle. It doesn’t matter if she’s in puke-stained pyjamas. It doesn’t matter whether she has her hair in tangles and her face unmade up. The early moments of feeling too tired to do more than concentrate on a new baby means that you can often miss those moments. Grab your camera and snap a few photos of the new mother in that stage of total euphoria and fear, so that she has that memory.

Older Children.
When you have a new baby and there are older children in the family already, it can be really difficult to spread the attention among the group. So, helping out by taking the older children out for the day to do some fun activities and even for a sleepover can really give a new mother a hand to adjust to a new routine. You don’t have to feed them sweets and treats to get them to feel good, either. Take them to a new movie or spend some time doing crafts with them. The guilt a mother can feel when she is dealing with a new baby and not spending time with the older children can be consuming, and when there are other hormones flying around it’s the last thing she needs. Support her by supporting her children.

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Go Out.
New mothers are often left behind by their circle of friends. It’s not always an intentional thing, it’s just one of those things where a new mother becomes overlooked as she continuously turns down invitations. Make a point of getting her partner to help by keeping the kids occupied and invite her out. Before a mother is a mother, she was a person first. A person with feelings, opinions and intelligence. Don’t underestimate the fact that motherhood has happened that she wouldn’t want to be treated that way still.

Being a support system for a new parent is just as important as having a support system for yourself. Never underestimate the need for a good support system, and never overlook the one that is around you in the form of friends and school moms. Your support can make such a difference to your life, so be the difference for someone else.

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